Ikraine, Ukraine, Wekraine

Czar Vlad, saw the pics of you greeting farmers in the fields of Stavropol, sporting jeans and a shirt. Very glad to see you opted for the shirt this time; still reeling from the searing shock on my eyeballs of your last episode of soft white bellied political porn"Vlad's Gone Bad". When shit like that comes creeping across the screen during lunch, it makes even In 'n Out a challenge to finish.
Dude you're short, you're stumpy, really kinda dumpy, with a face so forgettable if you didn't have Russia by the throat politically you wouldn't merit a passing first glance. Let alone a serious look.
JFK you 'aint.

Once again though you've demanded, and received our attention little man, so please share your myopic midget's vision of Russia's economic sphere of influence.
But first, can I suggest something new for you Vlad?
Go for something a little less Soviet/Czarist Re-Tread, and maybe something a bit more modern day Russia Realistic. That means, at least to most of us around the globe, that you start work on reeling in the thuggery and graft at home, before you coerce 'er I mean entice other Fourth World Countries to join your fiefdom. It's really your only legitimate hope to attract some other megolomaniac running a poor misfortuned former Soviet sub-state.

Unfortunately, that's the only path you know, because that's Russian history in a nutshell.
Rather than make a compelling offer of cooperaiton based on mutual benefit, you're trudging down the turgid path of lead or gold. Lead for the peasants and intelligentsia of any given target of conquest, gold for the overlords who implement your plans for re-conquest of lost empire.

History repeats itself again, though this time not in the media vaccuum of times past.
In real time we're all treated to the un-abated wholesale blitz of propaganda from both sides, along with ghoulish footage of slavic brothers killing each other at the whim of a kleptocratic-sociopathic dwarf.

Like I said Vlad, something new would be welcome.
Here's my suggestion; declare yourself retired, allow real democracy a chance to gain a foothold.
Then just hang back, enjoy the bazillion dollars, and equal amount of euros and pounds sterling, you no doubt have squirreled away around the globe. Everyone knows Russian banks aren't worth a shit.